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<p style=”margin-right: 0.6in; margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: 200%;”><span style=”font-family: ‘Times New Roman’, serif;”><span style=”font-size: medium;”><span style=”background: #ffff00;”>Love that Ashes is what you wrote, when he had suggested things like the smell of your mother’s skin, your favorite climbing tree, the soft fur of a cat as you stroke his back. Dramatic and brings us right back to her and to a depth of seriousness. Love the old? Man who is helping her, was looking for more description of him and the way he moved etc. Sort of a finder of things, wisdom man, wanted to spend more time with him. Great character. Also maybe in that beat before the word “ashes” we could see her thinking about one of his suggestions (which is what I was doing….) </span></span></span></p>
<p style=”margin-right: 0.6in; margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: 200%;”></p>Wonderful writing, Julie. Really like the temple of lost objects. What a conception. Very imaginative writing. Lovely description. Very much there. And curious to know what happens next. You have a delightful mix of mystery and descriptiveness that pulls the reader forward.
Julie,
Wow. This is quite a journey. I love where we’ve ended up here—that she is looking for the ashes. I was caught up in her missing home, and in the babies(?) she’d lost, and then we got to this major plot thread, and the chance that she’ll have conjured them—and I just find it an exciting, gripping turn. Well done.
I have a handful of smaller notes in the margins. Can’t wait to see what happens—with Nita, with the ashes, with Rebecca.
Warmly,
Elizabeth
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